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Aries. Very hairy.... Yes indeed. There are two paths the harry Aries can walk. When you are born you will either be bald or a ball of hair. The bald baby will grow hairier over time. Very hairy. On the other hand the hairy baby will grow to be very bald. As society has shown us it is much cooler to be a bald baby that grows up to be hairy than it is to be a hairy baby that grows up to be bald. It's a hairy situation. There are a few solutions... but before we get to that I would like to start by debunking some myths. If your baby is born hairy shaving the child will NOT prevent early onset baldness. If you shave your baby the most you will achieve is having a baby with 5 o clock shadow. At this time a baby with 5 o clock shadow is unwanted by our ever changing society. If you have a hairy baby and you try and sell it, this also will not work. The hair carries your DNA. At most you will have a 2 week reprieve and that baby will end up back at your house with a government agent. I have seen it happen many times. The punishment usually results in house arrest i.e. more time you have to be with the baby. There is no easy solution. The best thing you can do is simple! Plan your birth! Babies incubate within the womb for about 7-9 months. That means if you time your bang just right, you will know with confidence that you will not be fathering or mothering a hairy Aries. 

The zodiac dates for an Aries range from March 20 – April 19. that means you don't want to even look at a member of the opposite sex from the months of July- September. This is known as a preemptive bang scenario. November -June? Go crazy. you'll have to make up for lost time, but at least you won't have to chance creating a hairy Aries.

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Photographic Examples of Newborn Hairy Aries


Hair or Wigs?

It's time to choose

Call The Undercover Aries:


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